Have you ever heard a Pterodactyl scream?

No? Dinosaurs are extinct you say? I beg to differ. I believe my two year old is a reincarnated Pterodactyl. What proof do I have? The proof is in the pudding, or rather the Pterodactyl scream we all experience when she is unhappy.

This mostly happens in the car when I am completely powerless to appease my little dinosaur. She will decide that it is ridiculously unfair that she has to wear a seat belt and will begin thrashing about. And before you know it she is making sounds that no human could possibly make. And she makes them at decibels that only dogs can hear.

Her endurance is staggering. She kept it up once for twenty-five agonizing minutes. E and I were virtually deaf by the time we got home. Why not discipline or perhaps even bribe her, you ask? Oh, I've tried. I've tried it all.

I've tried distraction.

"O, look! There's a horsey."

Her response is to scream louder.

I've tried bribery.

"O, do you want some candy when we get home?"

This one might make her stop, but then she wants it RIGHT NOW, and well, we've stopped using that particular method.

I've tried ignoring her. She just wants attention, you may suggest. I've ignored her many, many times. She still screams.

I've tried the strict mom voice.

"O, if you don't stop this minute, I'm going to pull the car over."

I've actually pulled over a couple of times to no avail. She settles down, then screams the instant she's back in her car seat.

For the time being, I merely pray. That's all I'm left with. I pray she doesn't scream. I pray that if she does I will survive with eardrums intact. I pray that I won't sell her on the next corner I see. And I pray that if she really is a reincarnated Pterodactyl, that she'll soon forget and stop screaming.