That's my mother!

Every year, the chilren learn a cursory song to sing in church for Mother's Day. This year the song is "That's my mother." It's one of those catchy, slightly annoying songs they teach kids. And seeing as how I am now teaching the 11 year olds, I get to learn all the songs too. The lyrics go something like this:

Busy as a bumblebee (No problem, I am pretty busy)
That's my mother
Always cleaning after me (True true)
That's my mother
Driving all around the town (Yup, I also do a lot of that)
Helps me write my homework down (Not so much, but I get the idea.)
Hugs me when I have a frown (Most of the time, unless the child is just being a stink.)
That's my mother (Ok, we are good so far. Although, the tune is annoying and very memorable. I suppose that's the point. On to the second verse.)

Baking bread the whole day long (Ok, who is this woman?)
That's my mother
And she's hardly ever wrong (I can get on board with that!)
That's my mother
(I draw a blank here. I think I blacked out after hearing that line about baking bread!)
It's for her I sing this song
That's my mother (Awww thanks, but really, just clean up after yourselves. That's way more of a present than this annoying song that I am going to have stuck in my head for the next three days.)

I'm not a big fan of this lovely Mother's Day anthem. But I know what to expect on Mother's Day. A cheesy song that my kids will, for the most part, get up, stare into the audience and not sing to me. That's ok. I'll smile and think how cute they are anyway. So after church yesterday, I couldn't get it out of my head and I started making up lyrics. This is dangerous territory! My children and husband hopped on board and came up with this.

Lazy as an Elephant
That's my mother
Eating bon bons all day long
That's my mother
Making me do chores all day
And she's almost always wrong
It's for her I sing this song
That's my mother!

Awww, now there's honesty!